My purpose is in them.

Photo by Becky at Archives Photography

There's truly nothing more precious than a sweet baby smile, an excited giggle, or the gentle clap of tiny little hands. It was this that brought me out of the fog that I've been stuck in the last few days. I was in deep. If I had stretched out my arm, I wouldn't have seen my hand. Perhaps the outline would have been there, but it would've been unrecognizable. My heart was hurting in a way that felt so hopeless. It's incredibly painful when you realize you're not being a good wife, mother, or friend. It hurts to think that there's no purpose in you. And by you, of course, I mean me.

"To every broken heart, he stands with open arms. You are wanted." - Dara Maclean

But these babes, they need me. They want me around and I know I can be better for them. It's my goal every day. My purpose is in them.

When I'm feeling sad, I need only to run to my children who light up my world and clear up the fog that tries to engulf me with a simple smile. When K excitedly runs up with his latest, favorite train in his hands and tackles me for a hug...when A decides he'll let me snuggle with him for longer than thirty seconds-- these are my favorite times. Treasured moments. I want to hold on to them forever.