In all the years I've studied psychology, I do not recall ever learning about the "dead person rule". As I was reviewing for my final test in my class, I came across this and a little lightbulb turned on in my brain. I just had to share it with all of you. I thought it might be useful in training our husbands spouses (or some wording less offensive)!
Now before you get all "Mrs. K thinks she can train a person? How awful!" -Give me a chance to explain.
Before I got married, I was of the school of thought that says one shouldn't try to change anyone. Then my better half said the word unword "cabbard" as he was referring to a cabinet and I knew he needed a little training. You could liken this situation to your man leaving the toilet seat up. Or leaving his dirty socks on the floor. Just insert that one thing you want to fix alter.
Ok, that wasn't much of an explanation, was it?
Anywho, wanna know what I found? The "dead person rule" is:
"Never ask a client to do something a dead person can do" (Murdock, 2009)
In other words, the only behavior a dead person can actually accomplish is to cease behavior all together. Dead people lack behavior, right? So, the next time your spouse leaves a wet towel on the floor of the bathroom (or in Captain J's case, thrown haphazardly on my side of the bed?! Grr.), it is better to ask (very specifically) to hang the towel on the rack after the shower rather than simply saying, "Don't put your towel in the floor after your shower". See? Even dead people can do that.
(*Note: This has not been tested in our household.....yet).
I'll let you know what my research finds. I'm not going to hold my breath, though. But who knows? Maybe the dead person rule will work wonders. If not, there's always the use of reinforcers...and that TOTALLY works on my husband. Hehe :)
All this dead people talk reminds me of a joke I heard recently...
-What did the casket say to the other casket?
"Is that you coffin?"
Hardy har har.
P.S. I secretly like when Captain J doesn't get words right. It's cute.
Trained or not, I think I'll keep him.
4 comments:
hahaha thank you for sharing! CJ does the towel thing too!!! But sometimes he just throws it on the bed and leaves it there!! Does he think the bed won't get wet as well?? hahaha I've asked/told him numerous times to hang the towel instead of throwing it places. He sometimes forgets, but most of the time he remembers to hang it.. or maybe does it so that I don't start arguing lol.
hmmm.... I might have to try this one out.
ha!! What a great reminder :)
Thank you for sharing...haha. That just reminded me - In our house, we have a game that we play where we try to make words up and see if the other person buys it or not. It started from Scrabble (because my Husband contests that I make up words) and then became and inside joke. It's like a never-ending game of BS :)
And yes, the wet towel on the floor or ON THE BED, for crying out loud is just not cool...
:)
Ooo, I love the sounds of that game. I'm definitely going to start playing with J. He has some real doozies (inadvertently of course), but I bet I can slip a few by him without him knowing if it's legit or not :)
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