Friday, April 29, 2011

Blue, but not Royal

I thought today I would be ready to poke fun at all of you who woke up to watch The Royal Wedding, but I'm not feeling into it today. This morning I, too, got up early and turned on what I thought was the news. Unfortunately, all I saw was coverage, coverage, coverage of the big event. I suppose it's exciting, but I'm sure it doesn't need to be on every single channel. I'm sure some of you even remember waking up to watch the wedding of Princess Di, too and we all know how that turned out. When in doubt, SLEEP!

Ahh, perhaps I'm just bitter that I don't get to rock some of the fabulous hats that were in attendance today.

I should take my own advice and sleep when I'm feeling this way. I don't know what's wrong with my attitude this fine day. I'm having a bit of some pregnancy blues, I suppose. I want Baby K now. I want to spend my time taking care of him, not taking care of two dogs who just happen to be driving me nuts today. 

I also want to feel like a person again. I want to put on clothes and not want to run away from the mirror in horror. I'd like to get a taste of this pregnancy glow people speak of. I want a normal appetite. I want sushi and wine, but not necessarily together.

I want to not have to drive for hours every weekend from now until we PCS. I want to finish up this pregnancy and this duty station with a feeling of peace and not rushed chaos.

I want to not think about all the terrible things that could happen to Baby K that are beyond my control. Maybe you don't know this, but today is SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) Awareness Day...and I really don't want to think about that either.

I wish I could just chill out, relax and trust that God is in control of my little family.

But today I just can't help feeling blue.

And it all seems so selfish when I think of all of the people in this area who have suffered from the devastation the storms brought earlier this week. My prayers are with the entire Southeast during such a scary, sad time.

Psalm 30:5
Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.

4 comments:

Laura Jenkins said...

These are all very normal feelings Kacy! I was once sitting at home watching a football game while I was pregnant with my first son and just started crying for no apparent reason. You will have those days but they will pass! Have no fear!! You are gonna be fine, I know you will!!!

Nicole said...

Hey woman! Sorry you're feeling so down today. I hope you start to feel better soon! I missed your call when I was at work, and after work I called you back, but it went straight to voicemail, so I figured you were at that cookout you talked about. Anywho, not working tomorrow, but will be driving up to Albuquerque to get Izzy, so if you'd like to chat, give me a call! Miss you!

B. said...

Hope you're feeling better soon. It's OK to feel a little self-involved every once in a while. We all do it. As your baby counter says on the right...only about 100 days to go! ^_^

Mrs. K said...

Thanks for the encouragement. I do feel much better today!

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