Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Things I'm Afraid To Tell You

This topic has been floating around the blogging community lately. The first post I read I knew I wanted to throw in my two cents, too. By hiding behind my computer screen, I can paint the perfect picture of what my life looks like or what I want my life to look like. I choose what you see. But sometimes I try to let you in a little more- I try to give you glimpses into my struggles and my daily life. I know I appreciate when bloggers are real. Usually when I do write posts that aren't all that positive, I receive negative emails/comments. But I don't let them get to me too much. Because this blog? It's me. Take it or leave it.

Via


*I'm pregnant. You probably knew that if you frequent my blog. What you don't know? I look like I'm about six months pregnant. No joke. The cute little photo I posted a week ago is not what I look like right now. I showed so quickly and I'm only 11 weeks along. I can't believe how much I'm showing as I go throughout the day. It's exhausting to carry my nine month old and apparently my tee tiny little fetus and know it's only just the beginning. I'm afraid to say it, but I'm not one of those people who enjoys being pregnant. I actually think it's miserable and I hate to say that when so many of my friends are struggling right now to conceive. It makes me sound ungrateful. Don't get me wrong- I'm so excited and happy for this child, but the process of meeting him or her is not my favorite thing to do.

*This one is hard for me: We no longer have Drifter living with us. I haven't mentioned it on purpose because some people are so judgemental when it comes to pets. We gave him to a lady who lives in the area who has another husky. They get along famously. We just couldn't handle him anymore. It wasn't just one little thing. It was a culmination of several things. He couldn't be trusted inside around the baby. Outside, he was ruining the yard, making our landlords mad, and costing us hundreds of dollars trying to repair what he repeatedly destroyed. We tried everything we could think of, but when he started growling at kids- that was the last straw. We're not going to live our lives in fear that he might hurt our kids- inadvertently or not. I feel as if we are awful doggy parents for letting him go, but I feel confident in our decision as human parents and that role means way more to me. Holly is the only K-9 in our lives now and she is spoiled rotten once again. We miss Drifter occasionally when we think back to all the fun times we had with him. I imagine if we still lived in Alaska, we'd have him until the day he died, but he just couldn't handle life here in our growing family. Judge me if you must, but we did what was right for us.

*I'm a registered Republican. Some might (and have) called me a bible thumping Republican. I try not to get into politics much on my blog because it's not worth it to me. I've learned that I'm probably not going to be swayed much by what YOU have to say in that department and you probably won't change your mind based on whatever information I provide to you either. But there's something I simply can't ignore and those are blanket statements. They come from both sides and they're ignorant and ridiculous. If you make one, I'll probably take you off my mental list of 'people that can carry on intelligent conversation'. "Liberals are lazy. Republicans are greedy. Christians are stupid" et cetera- I can't stand to see this on my facebook and twitter feeds. We're probably all guilty to some degree, but it's such a backward way of thinking. Along these same lines, I don't like when people assume that because I label myself as a conservative that I must believe a certain way. Yes, I'm a right leaner, but no I don't care if gay people want to get married. Yes, I'm a Christian, but no I don't think that it's my place to judge anyone based on who they love. I just think politics should be reserved for things like, oh say, THE ECONOMY?! I don't know if you've noticed lately, but there's a lot that needs to be worked on in that department.

*My facebook job title reads "Freelance Writer", but I haven't sold anything or even written anything that I'm proud of lately. I sit down at the computer to do so and then the oven dings, the dryer buzzes  or the baby cries and I run off to do the things around the house that have to be done. Life calls. The {little} money I make on this ole blog is the only thing I contribute to our family with financially and that still bothers me on some level even though I've accepted that God wants me to stay at home with our children for now.

*On that note, I'm not currently working on my Master's either. I took another break. I couldn't do it. Well, that's a lie. I can do it, I just want to be able to focus on it and not worry that I'm not going to do well. I made it a goal of mine when I graduated college that if I went back, I would get a 4.0 with my next degree. As it stands, that is still an option for me but last semester I just barely came out of it with an A. Because Captain J is in grad school right now, I just didn't have the help I needed with the baby because he was busy with his work, too. I hope to go back when he finishes his up.

Allow me to sum it up for you-

I'm not perfect, folks. I hope we're still friends!

XOXO,
Mrs. K

14 comments:

Chantal said...

I hear you on the writing thing. I say I'm a writer but I haven't sat down to write since the baby was born 5 months ago. It's just so hard to work when she's napping because I just want to relax!

Karen said...

I am most definitely still your friend (seriously wish that maybe we lived in the same country so that we could be real life friends lol). Politics are such a touchy subject everywhere, it doesn't matter what country you live in. I'm a "Conservative" supporter here in Canada and I get a lot of flack for it. Thanks for sharing today :)

Louise Burnette Barnes said...

You are so stinking adorable.

Anonymous said...

You are an amazing person! You're not going to please everyone all the time. As long as you and your family are happy and healthy then you are doing better then most. :) we got our dog because the family couldn't deal with three (the daughter brought her back from college) so they were liking for someone who would love her and take good care of her. We are lucky to have her. And I'm sure the family you picked fells the same way. :) you have to look out for your family first. It's always sad if the fur babies don't work out.. But I'm sure he fits perfectly into their family :)
I really hate all the labels too. I'm independent so I can choose the one I agree with at that time... Sometimes I like a dem and sometimes I like the rep. So it just depends on who is running at the time. :) And I usually don't discuss religion or politics :) just for that reason :)

Please excuse the mistakes .. I can't go up and correct them :/ stupid phone

Melissa

Jenn said...

We would SO be IRL friends!!! :)

We had to give one of our dogs to my in-laws. And that is definitely a permanent thing for us. Your heart is in the right place in that you wanted to keep him- I straight up couldn't stand our second dog. She was mean around Sam and that was all i needed to give her the boot.

I hope the pregnancy starts feeling better soon. It's not easy taking care of one baby while growing another. Hugs to you friend!!

Megan said...

I never understood why people thought they had a right to tell another person how they should blog. I think it's good to be real on a blog, but nobody is obligated to share ALL of their life. What's wrong with having a place to be positive and show the nicer things in life? Readers need to always be aware that blogs are only a portion of one's daily life and not be critical when you don't share it all. It's your life and your blog!

Kristin said...

Yay for telling the truth! I admire people who are honest on their blogs.
As for the politics/religion point you made, I always assumed that I could be conservative in my beliefs and co-exist with others who did not feel the same way. However, lately, especially in this church I've been attending, I'm getting the message that we need to stop "sitting back" and start telling people how they are wrong. This doesn't sit well with me, so reading what you have to say made me feel better. I can't and don't want to tell people how to run their lives. It's not MY job.

Jenn said...

I completely agree with you on the politics and being real on your blog.
I am sure D is happy with his new home but I totally understand missing him.
Never feel like you have to hide how you feel around those who are struggling. Just because you aren't enjoying being pregnant doesn't mean you don't appreciate the blessing. There is a clear distinction between hearing someone complain because they are ungreatful and voicing concerns or difficulties they are going through. Those who are struggling know the difference. Anyone who can't well than they just need to learn to be happy for others.

Jenn said...

Oh and I still think you Look you hit up an all you can eat pasta place.

Miranda said...

One of my favorite entries! Love ya.

Becca said...

Ha! I love it :) This post just made me love ya that much more. It also made me tear up as I read it, especially the part about your doggie (I am so sorry). I too, am a registered Republican. It comes as quite a shock to most (you mean, you can be a Republican AND a scientist who cares about the environment and human rights, concurrently??! GASP).

Mrs. Duh said...

I love this post! I'm very political too, but try to never get into it on my blog. I'm sorry to hear about your doggie. I've had some friends who had kids and had to do the same thing. The kids have to come first.

Thanks for sharing and being honest! I may have to do this on my blog, too!

Amber Nicole said...

We're totally still friends! I love everything about this post.
I feel your pregnancy pain, after the 1st one, you show SO much sooner! It's crazy! And exhausting. Big hugs to you!

And, I feel your pain on the doggie. :( When David was deployed, I gave away Dixie. I avoided telling people for the same reason, but just KNEW I couldn't handle negative weather with a cooped up, hyper pup and a newborn. And now, I feel guilty that we got Bo. Especially since the lady that has Dixie is on my facebook and Dixie drives her up the wall half the time.

Jamie said...

Your. Best. Post. Ever.

Xoxo

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