the afternoon was ours

It was a Saturday when my heart stretched a little bit more. My husband was gone as he so often is due to the nature of his job. It was just my little ten month old and me. The morning had been full of daily chores that couldn't wait- dishes and diapers.

But the afternoon was ours.

There are days when being a mother is the hardest job of my life. It's always more than that, too though. It may feel like a job but it's a job I know I want and need more than anything else in this world. This particular day wasn't a difficult one, though. It was the gentle breeze, the breath of fresh air that happens when your children are happy and healthy. It was one of those days that I said yes to his every whimper. Sure, I'll bend my pregnant body over and walk you all around this house if you'd like to test your walking skills! I'd be so happy to sit and play with you, too. Would you like a new toy? I'll go get it for you.

You get the picture.

It came time to start supper and my dear child made it clear that he didn't want to be without me so I heaved him up onto my hip and attempted to cook with him beside me. I was preparing barbecue chicken and the last ingredient I needed to add to the sauce we were conjuring up was the barbecue sauce itself. As the squeeze bottle grew closer to being empty, it started to make that sound that means air is escaping. The first time it happened, my boy dropped his paci and turned to stare at it in wonderment. He is afraid of loud noises so I was preparing myself for him to start crying when I begrudgingly squeezed it again.

And then...

laughter- the kind that comes from your belly or your soul. It wasn't long before we were both cracking up, waiting on the next funny sound to come from the bottle. It never got old. I stood there and squeezed that bottle until my fingers were tired and my cheeks hurt from smiling so much.

My not-even-one year old made me laugh as only my siblings can. I giggled with him like I do my girlfriends. I smiled that smile that only his dad brings out in me.

Nothing else in the world mattered in that moment. I wasn't sad to be alone in a state I find less than attractive. I was joyful because I knew I was home because I was right there with him. Baby K is my home. His dad is my home. And the bundle of joy growing inside me is my home.

Funny thing about love. Just when you think you can't possibly love anyone anymore, you wake up the next day and realize you can...and you do.

(Photo by: Herald Photography)